i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
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