You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
Randomize
