you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
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