Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
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