Texts From Last Night

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  (305): View more from Florida

  alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.

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  (305): alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog. http://tfl.nu/iy0a
  Replies (15) Good night (1221) Bad night (3302)
• Favorite

  (253): View more from Washington

  um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street

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  (253): um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street http://tfl.nu/ikjt
  Replies (24) Good night (687) Bad night (3478)
• Favorite

  (630): View more from Illinois

  his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass

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  (630): his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass http://tfl.nu/ujep
  Replies (36) Good night (8788) Bad night (1154)
• Favorite

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...

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  (203): Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night... http://tfl.nu/4ooo
  Replies (7) Good night (1129) Bad night (4701)
• Favorite

  (678): View more from Georgia

  I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.

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  (678): I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head. http://tfl.nu/4u7e
  Replies (44) Good night (7379) Bad night (1897)
• Favorite

  (585): View more from New York

  If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.

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  (585): If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat. http://tfl.nu/1cgn
  Replies (33) Good night (3059) Bad night (4552)
• Favorite

  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope

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  (412): basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope http://tfl.nu/brdy
  Replies (28) Good night (1267) Bad night (4717)
• Favorite

  (843): View more from South Carolina

  i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.

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  (843): i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding. http://tfl.nu/yb0x
  Replies (15) Good night (1352) Bad night (3454)
• Favorite

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.

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  (610): I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead. http://tfl.nu/hl2l
  Replies (10) Good night (2839) Bad night (1421)
• Favorite

  (515): View more from Iowa

  IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.

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  (515): IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard. http://tfl.nu/ob2l
  Replies (1) Good night (960) Bad night (1834)
• Favorite

  (302): View more from Delaware

  the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark

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  (302): the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark http://tfl.nu/i1gh
  Replies (5) Good night (1722) Bad night (764)
• Favorite

  (931): View more from Tennessee

  I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.

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  (931): I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that. http://tfl.nu/d355
  Replies (6) Good night (1034) Bad night (1518)
• Favorite

  (416): View more from Toronto

  I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.

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  (416): I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison. http://tfl.nu/ptp6
  Replies (1) Good night (1216) Bad night (393)
• Favorite

  (308): View more from Nebraska

  I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.

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  (308): I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards. http://tfl.nu/31cw
  Replies (8) Good night (963) Bad night (688)
• Favorite

  (802): View more from Vermont

  I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex

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  (802): I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex http://tfl.nu/scxh
  Replies (3) Good night (285) Bad night (587)

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