i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
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