the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
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