he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Randomize
