I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Randomize
