**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
I wish your couch was made out of beer. I would drink like half of it.
They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
She's just so happy...and so naked.
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
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