i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
Randomize
