i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, new rule: You are no longer allowed to send me a text with the word "dildo" in it before 10am.
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
Randomize