She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
Randomize
