He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
he laminated a picture of his dick.
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Randomize
