I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
Randomize
