I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
I texted him: “Come over for the Super Bowl. I promise lots of scoring.”
My divorce is turning into a porn script
Randomize
