So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
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