Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
Randomize
