It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
