She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
Randomize
