No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
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