I wannas sexs uuuuu
I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
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