Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
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