I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
Randomize