all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
I forgot drug dealers have families, too. Cheers to a sober, uncomfortable, slightly enraging Thanksgiving.
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
Randomize
