operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
it's like iHOP with fire
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
I fucking hate you. Some slutty looking drunk chick backed her ass up across the bar and started grinding on you. You ignored her because you didn't want to share you drink
I care about my drink far more than her feelings
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
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