is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
smell my finger.
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
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