Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
Randomize
