His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
Randomize
