I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
Randomize
