If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize
