It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
