Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
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