Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
Randomize
