yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
what the fuck happened to the tacos
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Randomize
