Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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