For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
Is it bad that I feel proud to be the first one to puke in the apartment? And I did it in style?
You straight up painted the counter with steak, tequila and beer. You owe me a knew toothbrush.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
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