Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
Randomize
