Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
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