her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
Strip clubs it is bday boy. One condition. I am in full custody of your ID. I plan on being in no condition to coordinate rescue operations and we need to keep casualties to a minimum. You cannot be trusted.
Alright goddamnit. Can I bring my pirate hat?
I insist.
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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