No awkward lesbian experiences without me
They should really pass out barf bags in church
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
my poor anus
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
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