Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
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