Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
I think i peed on brittanys purse
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
Randomize