I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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