i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
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