i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
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I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
I just had sex on a roof
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
That was before I lit my hair on fire
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
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