"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
Fuck appropriateness.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
I didn't think this needed to be said, but our sexts are an emoji free zone
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize
