I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
So much rum. So many feels.
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
Randomize
