Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
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