You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
My Easter Basket from my parents consisted of one chocolate bunny and a massive amount of condoms and a single note saying "the pope approves of the use of condoms" love mom and dad
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
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