He told me i was the nicest person he's ever arrested for DUI
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
Some clips from last night: grinded like I haven't since college. Took shots with a bartender with a bad ass mustache. Made up a string of lies with fake names and occupations. Slept behind the couch with pizza in my hand
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
Randomize